September 11, 2009
“Nothing is more important than emotional energy. Nothing destroys emotional energy like a backlog of unmade decisions.” Mira Kirshenbaum in The Emotional Energy Factor
After going back and forth about whether to do so, I wrote a resume with the intention of applying for a new job the other day. It’s the first time I’ve felt “ready” since I left my last position – utterly exhausted. In the end, I didn’t submit it. While it would have been very practical in many ways, the job just didn’t feel right.
I have learned to trust my intuition in situations like this, even if I don’t understand the reason at the time. Today it became clear. While the job was something that I felt I should do – it wasn’t what I really wanted to do. This may seem selfish – perhaps even childish – but it’s not. It’s about making choices that are consistent with your values and your goals.
For months, I have been doing my best to care for myself and regain my energy. For too long, I had been making choices that left me feeling utterly exhausted. Now, after all this time, I no longer find it acceptable to exist that way.
Today, being drawn to the Wisdom of Avalon cards for some reason, I was prompted to stay present and focus on my goal. But I haven’t been clear about what that goal actually is. At first I thought it was to go back to work. That was the answer that I should be giving. But then reality hit me and I got honest with myself. My goal, in truth, is vitality.
With that honesty came a moment of clarity. If vitality is my goal, every decision I make must support it. I can stop the usual back and forth and sitting on the fence that I usually get caught up in and, instead, make a quick decision. In any given situation, I will honour myself and choose vitality.
Today, that means:
- Make healthier food choices – eating more gluten-free and alkaline foods
- Move my body
- Breathe
- Make an appointment for a massage
- Get outside in the sun
- Do something creative
- Start planning for my next sailing adventure
- Laugh
- Don’t waste time on things I don’t care about
- Love
Having the focus to make decisions that support my goal – and being clear about what that goal is – is so freeing. A lightness and sense of excitement about my future has taken over me.
In one moment of clarity, I have taken a step closer to having more energy and feeling vitality in my life. It seems so simple. Who knew that making a decision could do so much to lighten the load?
What unmade decisions have you been carrying around with you? Go ahead – decide – let go – and move on.
